Subject: Re: Re. Re: I-D Action: draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model-03.txt

From: "t.petch" <[email-masked]>
Date: Wed, 2 May 2018 11:19:32 +0100

Progressing, in the right direction:-)

I find
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model
a good template for many aspects of a YANG module I-D, better than the
recently published RFC

So,

YANG modules must have a copyright statement.

You should include a Note to the RFC Editor at the start of the I-D (not
the module) to replace all instances of XXXX with the RFC number as
published

You should include a Note to the RFC Editor to replace the dates in the
module with the date of publication of the RFC.

You need an Informative Reference to RFC8340 which explains the Tree
diagram Notation along with text to say so (see
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model for a good way to do this)

The module lacks any Reference clauses - this is fairly dire for anyone
who is not immersed in the technology.  Again, see
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model.

The indentation of the statements in the YANG module is awry, to put it
mildly, so much so that I have given up trying to read it:-(

Allied to this, there is a line length limit of 72 characters on all RFC
which needs to be respected.

Allied to this, there must be a left hand margin in all RFC.

The one technical comment (so far) is what is the pattern of  br-address
trying to tell me?  Given a week, perhaps a month, of spare time, may be
I could reverse engineer the meaning of it, but no, life is too short.

Tom Petch

----- Original Message -----
From: <[email-masked]>
To: <[email-masked]>; <[email-masked]>
Sent: Tuesday, February 27, 2018 8:04 AM
Subject: Re. Re: I-D Action:
draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model-01.txt

> Hi, Petch
>
>
> A new version draft has been submitted to the IETF website to fix your
comments. We add the descriptions of security consideration section.
>
>
> More comments are appreciatedly welcomed. Thanks.
>
>
>
>
> A new version of I-D, draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model-02.txt
>
> has been successfully submitted by Fangwei Hu and posted to the
>
> IETF repository.
>
>
>
>
> Name:        draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model
>
> Revision:    02
>
> Title:        YANG Data Model for Configuration Interface of
Control-Plane and User- Plane separation BNG
>
> Document date:    2018-02-26
>
> Group:        Individual Submission
>
> Pages:        32
>
> URL:
https://www.ietf.org/internet-drafts/draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-m
odel-02.txt
> Status:
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model
/
> Htmlized:
https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model-02
> Htmlized:
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/html/draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-
model-02
> Diff:
https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-mode
l-02
>
>
>
>
> Abstract:
>
>    This document defines the YANG data model for operation management
of
>
>    Control-Plane and User-Plane separation BNG.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Regards.
>
>
> Fangwei.
>
>
>
>
>
> 发件人： <[email-masked]>;
> 收件人：胡方伟10075772;
> 抄送人： <[email-masked]>;
> 日 期 ：2018年01月30日 21:27
> 主 题 ：Re: Re: I-D Action:
draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model-01.txt
>
>
> Fangwei
>
> I don't know if you are familiar with
>    Guidelines for Authors and Reviewers of YANG Data Model Documents
>                     draft-ietf-netmod-rfc6087bis-16
> but that is where I look for the latest on red tape for YANG modules.
>
> It is in Last Call and so is reasonably stable.
>
> It is rather big but can be dipped into to find e.g. what is needed
for
> the section on Security Considerations.
>
> Tom Petch
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: <[email-masked]>
> To: <[email-masked]>
> Cc: <[email-masked]>
> Sent: Monday, January 29, 2018 1:21 AM
>
> > Hi, Petch
> >
> >
> > Thanks for your comments, I will update the draft to fix the
> questions.
> >
> >
> > Regards
> >
> >
> > Fangwei.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > 原始邮件
> >
> >
> >
> > 发件人： <[email-masked]>;
> > 收件人： <[email-masked]>;
> > 抄送人：胡方伟10075772;
> > 日 期 ：2018年01月27日 01:45
> > 主 题 ：Re: I-D Action: draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model-01.txt
> >
> >
> > This I-D is still lacking some basics e.g. you cannot have a YANG
> module
> > without IANA Considerations or without Security Considerations nor
are
> > most of the necessary Normative References listed..
> >
> > Tom Petch
> >
> > ----- Original Message -----
> > From: <[email-masked]>
> > To: <[email-masked]>
> > Sent: Thursday, January 25, 2018 7:56 AM
> >
> > >
> > > A New Internet-Draft is available from the on-line Internet-Drafts
> > directories.
> > >
> > >
> > >         Title           : YANG Data Model for Configuration
> Interface
> > of Control-Plane and User- Plane separation BNG
> > >         Authors         : Fangwei Hu
> > >                           RongRong Hua
> > >                           Shujun Hu
> > > Filename        : draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model-01.txt
> > > Pages           : 30
> > > Date            : 2018-01-24
> > >
> > > Abstract:
> > >    This document defines the YANG data model for operation
> management
> > of
> > >    Control-Plane and User-Plane separation BNG.
> > >
> > >
> > > The IETF datatracker status page for this draft is:
> > >
> >
>
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model
> > /
> > >
> > > There are also htmlized versions available at:
> > >
> https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-model-01
> > >
> >
>
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/html/draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-
> > model-01
> > >
> > > A diff from the previous version is available at:
> > >
> >
>
https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-hu-rtgwg-cu-separation-yang-mode
> > l-01
> > >
> > >
> > > Please note that it may take a couple of minutes from the time of
> > submission
> > > until the htmlized version and diff are available at
tools.ietf.org.
> > >
> > > Internet-Drafts are also available by anonymous FTP at:
> > > ftp://ftp.ietf.org/internet-drafts/
> > >
> > > _______________________________________________
> > > I-D-Announce mailing list
> > > [email-masked]
> > > https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/i-d-announce
> > > Internet-Draft directories: http://www.ietf.org/shadow.html
> > > or ftp://ftp.ietf.org/ietf/1shadow-sites.txt