Subject: [http-state] draft-ietf-httpstate-cookie-09 editorial nits

From: Julian Reschke <[email-masked]>
Date: Tue, 13 Jul 2010 15:15:48 +0200

INTRODUCTION, paragraph 6:
OLD:

    If you have suggestions for improving this document, please send
    email to <mailto:[email-masked]>.  Suggestions with test cases
    are especially appreciated.  Further Working Group information is
    available from <https://tools.ietf.org/wg/httpstate/>

NEW:

    If you have suggestions for improving this document, please send
    email to <mailto:[email-masked]>.  Suggestions with test cases
    are especially appreciated.  Further Working Group information is
    available from <https://tools.ietf.org/wg/httpstate/>.

(missing dot)

Section 3.1., paragraph 9:
OLD:

    As shown the next example, the server can store multiple cookies at
    the user agent.  For example, the server can store a session
    identifier as well as the user's preferred language by returning two
    Set-Cookie header fields.  Notice that the server uses the Secure and
    HttpOnly attributes to provide additional security protections for
    the more-sensitive session identifier (see Section 4.1.2.

NEW:

    As shown in the next example, the server can store multiple cookies
    at the user agent.  For example, the server can store a session
    identifier as well as the user's preferred language by returning two
    Set-Cookie header fields.  Notice that the server uses the Secure and
    HttpOnly attributes to provide additional security protections for
    the more-sensitive session identifier (see Section 4.1.2).

missing "in"
missing ")"

Section 3.1., paragraph 14:
OLD:

    If the server wishes the user agent to persist the cookie over
    multiple "sessions," the server can specify an expiration date in the
    Expires attribute.  Note that the user agent might delete the cookie
    before the expiration date if the user agent's cookie store exceeds
    its quota or if the user manually deletes the server's cookie.

NEW:

    If the server wishes the user agent to persist the cookie over
    multiple "sessions", the server can specify an expiration date in the
    Expires attribute.  Note that the user agent might delete the cookie
    before the expiration date if the user agent's cookie store exceeds
    its quota or if the user manually deletes the server's cookie.

s/"sessions,"/"sessions",/

Section 4.1.1., paragraph 3:
OLD:

  cookie-av         = expires-av / max-age-av / domain-av /
                      path-av / secure-av / httponly-av /
                      extension-av
  expires-av        = "Expires=" sane-cookie-date
  sane-cookie-date  = <rfc1123-date, defined in [RFC 2616], Section 3.3.1>
                      ; Note that RFC 2616 uses a different grammatical
                      ; notation than this document (which uses ABNF
                      ; from [RFC5234]).
  max-age-av        = "Max-Age=" 1*DIGIT
  domain-av         = "Domain=" domain-value
  domain-value      = <subdomain, defined in [RFC 1034], Section 3.5>
  path-av           = "Path=" path-value
  path-value        = <any CHAR except CTLs or ";">
  secure-av         = "Secure"
  httponly-av       = "HttpOnly"
  extension-av      = <any CHAR except CTLs or ";">

NEW:

  cookie-av         = expires-av / max-age-av / domain-av /
                      path-av / secure-av / httponly-av /
                      extension-av
  expires-av        = "Expires=" sane-cookie-date
  sane-cookie-date  = <rfc1123-date, defined in [RFC2616], Section 3.3.1>
  max-age-av        = "Max-Age=" 1*DIGIT
  domain-av         = "Domain=" domain-value
  domain-value      = <subdomain, defined in [RFC1034], Section 3.5>
  path-av           = "Path=" path-value
  path-value        = <any CHAR except CTLs or ";">
  secure-av         = "Secure"
  httponly-av       = "HttpOnly"
  extension-av      = <any CHAR except CTLs or ";">

no space between "RFC" and "xxxx" in references...

---

From: Adam Barth <[email-masked]>
Date: Tue, 13 Jul 2010 08:40:53 -0700

>   available from <https://tools.ietf.org/wg/httpstate/>.

Done.

>   the more-sensitive session identifier (see Section 4.1.2).

Done.

> s/"sessions,"/"sessions",/

Ok.  That's not standard english, but maybe that's a style quirk the IETF uses?

> no space between "RFC" and "xxxx" in references...

Done.  You show the comment about sane-cookie-date being removed, but
presumably it's fine to keep?  Some folks in the working group thought
it was important.

Adam

---

From: Julian Reschke <[email-masked]>
Date: Tue, 13 Jul 2010 17:46:43 +0200

On 13.07.2010 17:40, Adam Barth wrote:
> ...
> ...

Is there a standard? (/me ducks). As far as I know it's the format that 
the style the RFC Editor uses, so using it right away saves you from 
reviewing diffs once you get close to publication.

>>   sane-cookie-date  =<rfc1123-date, defined in [RFC 2616], Section 3.3.1>
>>   domain-value      =<subdomain, defined in [RFC 1034], Section 3.5>
>>   path-value        =<any CHAR except CTLs or ";">
>>   secure-av         = "Secure"
>>   httponly-av       = "HttpOnly"
>>   extension-av      =<any CHAR except CTLs or ";">
>>
>> NEW:
>>
>>   sane-cookie-date  =<rfc1123-date, defined in [RFC2616], Section 3.3.1>
>>   domain-value      =<subdomain, defined in [RFC1034], Section 3.5>
>>   path-value        =<any CHAR except CTLs or ";">
>>   secure-av         = "Secure"
>>   httponly-av       = "HttpOnly"
>>   extension-av      =<any CHAR except CTLs or ";">
>>
> ...

Right, that wasn't intentional. Maybe a glitch in my edits or in the 
diff tool.

Best regards, Julian

---

From: Adam Barth <[email-masked]>
Date: Tue, 13 Jul 2010 08:51:07 -0700

On Tue, Jul 13, 2010 at 8:46 AM, Julian Reschke <[email-masked]> wrote:
> Is there a standard? (/me ducks).

I use <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Elements_of_Style> with the
Oxford comma, which is quite common in American English publications.

> As far as I know it's the format that the
> style the RFC Editor uses, so using it right away saves you from reviewing
> diffs once you get close to publication.

Ok.  I've moved the comma.  :)

> Right, that wasn't intentional. Maybe a glitch in my edits or in the diff
> tool.

Thanks,
Adam

---

From: Peter Saint-Andre <[email-masked]>
Date: Tue, 13 Jul 2010 10:55:55 -0600

> Ok.  I've moved the comma.  :)

Yes, that is RFC Editor format, see Section 3.3 of "RFC Document Style":

http://www.rfc-editor.org/rfc-style-guide/rfc-style

Peter

-- 
Peter Saint-Andre
https://stpeter.im/

---

From: "Anne van Kesteren" <[email-masked]>
Date: Tue, 13 Jul 2010 18:59:48 +0200

> http://www.rfc-editor.org/rfc-style-guide/rfc-style

The case under discussion, whether the comma should be before the  
quotation mark or after it, does not appear to be discussed there.  
However, searching for '",' yields many hits while searching for ',"' in  
that document does not.

-- 
Anne van Kesteren
http://annevankesteren.nl/

---

From: Peter Saint-Andre <[email-masked]>
Date: Tue, 13 Jul 2010 11:16:24 -0600

On 7/13/10 10:59 AM, Anne van Kesteren wrote:
> On Tue, 13 Jul 2010 18:55:55 +0200, Peter Saint-Andre
> <[email-masked]> wrote:

The rule is:

   *  The RFC style places punctuation outside quotation marks, e.g.,

             'Search for the string "Error Found"'.

Whether there are examples of every possible punctuation mark is another
story. And feel free to contact [email-masked] if you seek
clarification.

Peter

-- 
Peter Saint-Andre
https://stpeter.im/