Subject: [Iptel] review of draft-ietf-iptel-trunk-group-04.txt

From: Alexander Mayrhofer <[email-masked]>
Date: Wed, 02 Nov 2005 14:44:41 +0100

Hi,

from my perspective, the document is in a very good shape - however, i've 
found two small nits:

- "VoIP" is never expanded in the draft, and does not appear on the list of 
well known abbreviations of http://www.rfc-editor.org/policy.html.

- Figure 1 on page 9 breaks to page 10 because of a single line. This should 
be corrected for readability, probably by removing the "empty" line in the 
figure above "Send to PSTN" (or a similar "trick").

What i'm not sure about is the naming of the example sections. Personally, i 
prefer to know from the section title what the example is all about, so i 
suggest changing the "Example 1" title into "Basic call flow" and "Example 
2" into "Cross domain call flow". Opinions about this?

cheers

alex

_______________________________________________
Iptel mailing list
[email-masked]
https://www1.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/iptel

---

From: "Vijay K. Gurbani" <[email-masked]>
Date: Wed, 02 Nov 2005 13:12:43 -0600

Alexander Mayrhofer wrote:
> Hi,
> 
> from my perspective, the document is in a very good shape - however, 
> i've found two small nits:

Alex:

Thank you for your time in turning this around so quickly.
I will incorporate the two nits and re-name the Examples
sections as you suggest.

> - "VoIP" is never expanded in the draft, and does not appear on the list 
> of well known abbreviations of http://www.rfc-editor.org/policy.html.
> 
> - Figure 1 on page 9 breaks to page 10 because of a single line. This 
> should be corrected for readability, probably by removing the "empty" 
> line in the figure above "Send to PSTN" (or a similar "trick").
> 
> What i'm not sure about is the naming of the example sections. 
> Personally, i prefer to know from the section title what the example is 
> all about, so i suggest changing the "Example 1" title into "Basic call 
> flow" and "Example 2" into "Cross domain call flow". Opinions about this?

Best regards,

- vijay
-- 
Vijay K. Gurbani, Ph.D.  vkg@{lucent.com,research.bell-labs.com,acm.org}
Lucent Technologies/Bell Labs Innovations, 2000 Lucent Lane, Rm 6G-440
Naperville, Illinois 60566     Voice: +1 630 224 0216
_______________________________________________
Iptel mailing list
[email-masked]
https://www1.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/iptel

---

From: Cullen Jennings <[email-masked]>
Date: Sat, 05 Nov 2005 08:16:04 -0800

I think we need to change the IANA section to just say it has no IANA
registration since 3966 never created a registry.

I'd like to delete the comment in the abstract about the mailing list to
use. 

Need to check that none of the "trunk-group" got broken across a line break.

Abstract ahs weird "group- related". Need to remove the -.

Last para before section 4 - change "this Internet draft" to "this
specification"

Again in section 4.4 change "draft MAY" to "specification MAY"

Last para before section 6 need to change "this draft" to "this
specification"

Update tgrep ref to version 06