Subject: [Sipping] draft-ietf-sipping-kpml-08 NITS

From: Bert Culpepper <[email-masked]>
Date: Sun, 30 Jul 2006 22:15:42 -0400

I see a new draft has been submitted, mostly addressing NITS it seems. 
I have some suggestions for additional clarification.

Given the one change in the first paragraph of section 1 (from "DTMF 
signals" to "key presses", I believe the following changes are also in 
order.  This package is primarily about key presses, not DTMF transport, 
although a targeted use is to replace DTMF transport for user 
interaction in certain scenarios. Anyway, here are some changes that may 
be appropriate.

Section 1., paragraph 5: replace "...signaling by transporting DTMF 
tones..." with "...signaling key presses on the telephone dial pad by 
transporting DTMF tones...".

Section 2., paragraph 1: "digits" is used three times, should use "keys" 
or "key presses".

Section 2., paragraph 3: "DTMF values" is used, how about "key values"?

Section 2., paragraph 4: "digitmap" is used, it should be "DRegex", 
"pattern" or something specified in this document IMHO.

Section 3.1., Note: "digit maps" is used, should be "patterns".

Section 3.1., 2nd paragraph after the Note: replace "match" with 
"pattern match" on the first line.

Section 3.1., 4th paragraph after the note: "digits" is used twice, it 
should be "key presses" or "key press indicators" IMHO.

Section 3.2., 3 bullets: calling the timer "inter-digit timer" is OK but 
the use of "digits" in the text should probably be replaced with "key 
presses".

Section 3.3., second paragraph after Fig. 6: "digits" is used twice, I 
suggest "key presses".

Section 3.4., 2nd note: "digit" is used in the last sentence, "User 
Input" may be better.

Section 3.4., last paragraph: replace "digit string" with "key 
sequence", replace "hold digits" with "hold key presses".

Section 3.5., 2nd paragraph: replace "digits" with "User Inputs".

Section 3.5., page 16, 3rd paragraph: replace "digit maps" with 
"patterns".  This change may also be made in the last paragraph on page 16.

Section 4.2.: This is new text.  It seems the typical SUBSCRIBE to a 
User Interface would be for the session as seen from its point of view. 
  That is, should local-tag refer to the From tag, and remote-tag refer 
to the To tag here?

Section 4.3.: "...which digit patterns..." should be "...which User 
Input patterns...".

Section 4.7., page 24, 5th paragraph: replace "...digits against the 
document." with "...User Input against the document.".

Section 4.8., 5th paragraph: "If there are buffered digits in the 
SUBSCRIBE request that match a pattern," should be "If there is buffered 
User Input that matches the pattern in the SUBSCRIBE request,".

Section 4.8., 6th paragraph after Fig. 10: "digits" should be "User Input".

Section 4.8., 3rd paragraph on page 27: I would suggest "digits" should 
be "User Input", but the paragraph's intent may be telephone dial pad 
specific.  It does seem odd to be discussing this here though.

Section 4.8., 4th paragraph on page 27: here I think "digits" should be 
"indications in the media stream(s)"???

Section 8., first paragraph: "...if digits buffered earlier" should be 
"...User Input buffered earlier...".

I believe the above changes will add consistency, since once we get past 
the motivational discussion, the rest of the document talks about User 
Interface, User Input and key presses.

Best Regards,

Bert

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---

From: "Burger, Eric" <[email-masked]>
Date: Sun, 30 Jul 2006 22:47:00 -0400

I like it.  Sounds like all editorial to me :)  Anyone not think we can
do this in AUTH48?

-----Original Message-----
From: Bert Culpepper [mailto:[email-masked]] 
Sent: Sunday, July 30, 2006 10:16 PM
To: Burger, Eric; [email-masked]
Cc: [email-masked]
Subject: draft-ietf-sipping-kpml-08 NITS

be appropriate.

or "key presses".

Section 3.5., page 16, 3rd paragraph: replace "digit maps" with 
"patterns".  This change may also be made in the last paragraph on page
16.

Section 4.8., 6th paragraph after Fig. 10: "digits" should be "User
Input".

Best Regards,

Bert