Subject: [BEHAVE] WGLC for translation documents (6 documents)

From: "Dan Wing" <[email-masked]>
Date: Thu, 17 Dec 2009 23:47:19 -0800

We appear ready to start the working group last call for our set of IPv6/IPv4
translation documents.  This is a two-week WGLC.

We need 5 reviewers to say a document is ready before we will forward the
documents to the IESG.  A few people have already volunteered, but we need
more!  Please see http://trac.tools.ietf.org/wg/behave/trac/wiki/WikiStart.
If you are already reading the document, this is easy -- just email the chairs
after your review.

The documents starting WGLC are:

http://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-behave-v6v4-framework-04
http://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-behave-v6v4-xlate-05
http://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-behave-v6v4-xlate-stateful-07
http://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-behave-dns64-05
http://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-behave-address-format-03
http://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-behave-ftp64-00

This is a two week WGLC finishing on December 31.  Please send substantive
review comments to [email-masked] and (if possible) send editorial comments
only to the authors at [email-masked].

Thanks,
-Dan and Dave

---

From: Xiangsong Cui <[email-masked]>
Date: Mon, 21 Dec 2009 15:36:25 +0800

Dear chairs and all,

I have read the draft  ietf-behave-dns64-05, I have some comments.

Technical comments:
section 5.2, the second paragraph,
      The same algorithm to create an IPv6 address from an IPv4 address
      MUST be used by both the DNS64 to create the IPv6 address to be
      returned in the synthetic AAAA RR from the IPv4 address contained
      in original A RR, and by the IPv6/IPv4 translator to create the
      IPv6 address to be included in the destination address field of
                                                           ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
      the outgoing IPv6 packets from the IPv4 address included in the
      destination address field of the incoming IPv4 packet.

in my understanding, the *destination address* with remark should be 
*source address*, is that right?

Some typos comments,

section 2,
     The main different in the nature of the two types of prefixes is that
=>The main difference in the nature of the two types of prefixes is that

Section 5.2
     of IPv4 addresses defined Section 2 of
=> of IPv4 addresses defined in Section 2 of

whole document,
a AAAA  => an AAAA

Others are OK, thanks the authors for the good job!

Regards
Xiangsong

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Dan Wing" <[email-masked]>
To: <[email-masked]>
Cc: <[email-masked]>
Sent: Friday, December 18, 2009 3:47 PM
Subject: [BEHAVE] WGLC for translation documents (6 documents)

> _______________________________________________
> Behave mailing list
> [email-masked]
> https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/behave

---

From: Xiangsong Cui <[email-masked]>
Date: Mon, 21 Dec 2009 17:41:41 +0800

Dear chairs and all,

I have read the draft behave-v6v4-xlate-stateful-07, and I have some comments.

Technical comments, (similar to DNS64 draft)
section 3.2.4
         The NAT64 to create the IPv6 address to be included in the
         destination address field of the outgoing IPv6 packets from the
          ^^^^^^^^
         IPv4 address included in the destination address field of the
                                                     ^^^^^^^^
         incoming IPv4 packet.
=>     The NAT64 to create the IPv6 address to be included in the
         source address field of the outgoing IPv6 packets from the
         IPv4 address included in the source address field of the
         incoming IPv4 packet.
right?

Editorial comments:
page 6, two interfaces, an IPv4 interface connected to the the IPv4 network,
=>       two interfaces, an IPv4 interface connected to the IPv4 network,

page 14, result of the flow of packets as described in the Section 3.2 but the
=>          result of the flow of packets as described in the Section 3.2 but they

page 15, 
(1st)      For each Session Table Entry (STE), there are then five columns:
=>        For each TCP or UDP Session Table Entry (STE), there are then five columns:

(2nd)     For each Session Table Entry (STE), there are then six columns:
=>         For each ICMP Query Session Table Entry (STE), there are then six columns:

a incoming => an incoming,
a ICMP    => an ICMP

Others are OK, thanks the authors for the good job.

Regards
Xiangsong