Subject: [DNSOP] Lars Eggert's No Objection on draft-ietf-dnsop-rfc7816bis-10: (with COMMENT)

From: Lars Eggert via Datatracker <[email-masked]>
Date: Tue, 24 Aug 2021 03:39:09 -0700

Lars Eggert has entered the following ballot position for
draft-ietf-dnsop-rfc7816bis-10: No Objection

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COMMENT:
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DOWNREF from this Standards Track doc to Experimental [RFC7816].

"Abstract", paragraph 3, comment:
>    This document is part of the IETF DNSOP (DNS Operations) Working
>    Group.  The source of the document, as well as a list of open issues,
>    is at <https://framagit.org/bortzmeyer/rfc7816-bis>

Should this not be removed before publication?

Obsolete reference to RFC7626, obsoleted by RFC9076 (this may be on purpose).

Found terminology that should be reviewed for inclusivity; see
https://www.rfc-editor.org/part2/#inclusive_language for background and more
guidance:

 * Terms "traditional", "tradition", "Traditionally"; alternatives might be
   "classic", "classical", "common", "conventional", "customary", "fixed",
   "habitual", "historic", "long-established", "popular", "prescribed",
   "regular", "rooted", "time-honored", "universal", "widely used",
   "widespread".

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All comments below are about very minor potential issues that you may choose to
address in some way - or ignore - as you see fit. Some were flagged by
automated tools (via https://github.com/larseggert/ietf-reviewtool), so there
will likely be some false positives. There is no need to let me know what you
did with these suggestions.

"Table of Contents", paragraph 2, nit:
> ed in Section 6.1 of [RFC6973]: the less data you send out, the fewer privac
>                                     ^^^^
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun data is countable. (Also elsewhere.)

Section 1.2. , paragraph 3, nit:
>  is to minimise the amount of privacy sensitive data sent from the DNS resolv
>                               ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen. (Also elsewhere.)

Section 4. , paragraph 1, nit:
> en saved if the incoming QTYPE would have been the same as the QTYPE selected
>                                ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Did you mean "had been"? (Also elsewhere.)