Subject: [GROW] AD review of: draft-ietf-grow-bmp-adj-rib-out

From: Warren Kumari <[email-masked]>
Date: Fri, 31 May 2019 01:14:36 +0000

Hi there,

Thanks to the authors and WG for this document -- it provides a useful
mechanism / enhancement, is well written, and easy to understand.

I do have a few editorial comments that I'd like to see addressed
before starting IETF LC. Note that these are mostly nit type things,
and could be handled by the RFC Editor; but fixing them now will both
remove load from the RFC Ed, and also make it easier / more pleasant
for people reading during IETF LC, directorate reviewers and the IESG
(also, once people start complaining about editorial stuff it often
spirals into larger issues :-)).

1: "This document updates BGP Monitoring Protocol ..." - I think this
is missing "the"

2: "Adding Adj-RIB-Out enables the ability for a BMP sender... " - I
suggest "provides the ability"

3: "As with Adj-RIB-In policy validation, there are use-cases that
pre-policy Adj-RIB-Out is used to validate and audit outbound
policies."  - I find this sentence confusing. How is: "Similarly to
Adj-RIB-In policy validation, pre-policy Adj-RIB-Out can be used to
validate and audit outbound policies."? Or can the sentence be
reworded?

4: "Some attributes are set only during transmission of the BGP
message, e.g.  Post-Policy."  -- I don't think the "e.g. Post-Policy"
bit makes sense here - perhaps "ie. Post-Policy" was what was
intended? Or can that just be dropped (I don't think it adds
anything).

5: "In this use-case, there maybe hundreds of wholesale peers but a
single peer could have represented the  group.
  A single peer could be used to represent a group." -- duplicate?
Also, "maybe" should be "may be".

Again, I fully get that these are nits / editorial issues, but
addressing them now help avoid issues later in the process...

W

-- 
I don't think the execution is relevant when it was obviously a bad
idea in the first place.
This is like putting rabid weasels in your pants, and later expressing
regret at having chosen those particular rabid weasels and that pair
of pants.
   ---maf